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Dear
Jilly:
 I'd
greatly appreciate some feedback on whether I should seriously consider
a relationship with an "old Scorpio flame" that recently contacted
me. We met in 1993 and haven't seen each other in five years, though our
connection seems very strong still. I now live on the West coast and he
is on the East coast. He is basically a "free spirit" who works
only minimally. I broke up with him when it appeared I would be the one
working all the time to support us. There is nothing that would lead me
to believe anything has changed regarding this issue. Yet, the connection
between us can feel so powerful and compelling that I find myself considering
a relationship that may not ultimately be good for me.
Is there
really a "big love" between us and, if so, is it a healthy love
that can be demonstrated in a committed relationship?
Sincerely,
Hope
Dear
Hope:
“So why has
this free-spirited fellow contacted you again?” I wondered when I received
your letter. No matter how free this dude may seem, he's a triple Scorpio
(Sun, Moon and Ascendant) so I'm sure all his moves are quite plotted!
He must've sensed that Jupiter (planet of good luck and expansion) is
shining on you right now, Hope. This devil-may-care planet has been transiting
your First House of personality since July.
You two do
have quite an unpredictable connection. Jimmy's Uranus, a planet that
often comes to town in abrupt and unsettling ways, is conjunct your
Mars (sex, passion) in homey, settle-down Cancer. Here's the thing, lovergirl:
Although when Jimmy wants you he really wants you, his desires are completely
erratic. And since you are likely to have the best sex possible with someone
you can trust and hook up with for life (that's Mars in Cancer for you),
I don't know if Jimmy is your man.
You see,
Jimmy's Uranus in Cancer sits in his Eighth House of sex, which means
that he could very well propose to you in a moment of passion and then
change his mind just as abruptly. In addition, your Saturn (planet of
discipline and responsibility) makes a wide conjunction to Jimmy's Moon
(emotional nature) and Ascendant (outer persona/physical self) in sexy
Scorpio. Basically, the boy is always putting you in a parental role and
always taunting you to spank him. This may be fun sometimes as a sex game,
but not as a relationship dynamic!
The question
is, do you want to play that role only, or do you want more? If you want
more, you may be able to get it (may!) but you really have to be a disciplinarian.
Praise him and reward him when he's good to you, and withdraw from him
when he plays the role of a free (loading!) spirit.
I know that
one of your concerns has to do with his erratic job habits. Here's some
insight as to why he's so laid back. Jimmy has lucky Jupiter in
Taurus (money and pleasure oriented sign) in his Sixth House of daily work. The
guy is just fortunate enough to be able to fall into a nice money-making
venture when he needs to. He knows he's lucky in this area, and so may
be a little lazy because of it. And guess what you have in your house
of work, Hope baby? Saturn—which means that you have a strong work ethic
and can do well in your day job, but you will always have to work for
what you get. (Don't worry though, the harder you work, and the more you
plan, the MORE you get!)
In addition,
Chiron (an asteroid that represent a spiritual wound that the person must
heal) sits right on top of Jimmy’s Venus (planet of love) in melancholy
Capricorn in his Second House of permanence. Perhaps Jimmy didn't feel
secure in his father's love as a child (Capricorn is associated with father
figures). As an adult he may feel perpetually insecure about whether he
will ever have permanent love in his life. That's why he may not even
TRY to work on a lasting relationship, or why he may unconsciously sabotage
it. Ironically, long-term love is just the thing that would heal this
childhood wound for old Jimmy.
So what to
do with this guy? I suggest you first come up with your own set of "Hope's
Rules" and make them clear to Jimmy before you even share one dirty
dance with him! In May 2001, Jupiter will transit your Venus, so you are
bound to feel extra lucky in love them. Remember, if Jimmy doesn't play
by your rules, you will have plenty of other guys to choose from.
Good luck!
Jilly
Notes
Send relationship
questions to Jill at ASTROJILLY@aol.com. Please include the words "Bedroom
Astrology" in the subject line.
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